Update: Roy’s seasonal position at the old post office has since ended, and he has returned to life on the road. The article below remains as originally told during his month behind the counter.
Summer jobs are tough to fill in places where the heat chases most people away before noon. Fortunately, Roy Skeleton was available when an old post office needed a seasonal employee to work behind the counter.
He had been restless and was ready for another side quest. As a full-time nomad, he understands that temporary work can keep the gas tank full and provide a reason to stay in one town for a while. The fact that this particular job had not changed much in several decades only made him more qualified.
The Perfect Seasonal Employee
Roy arrived without a résumé, references, or any recent employment history. Management decided to focus on his strengths. He had no concerns about sunburn, and his body temperature had remained remarkably stable for several decades. He never complained about the heat, asked to leave early, or requested a chair with better back support.
The post office needed someone to hold down the counter until cooler weather arrived. Roy was willing to remain in one place for an unreasonable amount of time, so management gave him the job.
He became the town’s newest bare-bones seasonal employee.
Working at the Old Post Office
Business moved slowly inside the old post office. Most of the customers appeared to be ghosts, and outgoing mail left whenever the next horse came through town. Nobody seemed concerned about tracking numbers or two-day delivery.
Roy adjusted to the pace immediately.
He stood behind the counter and waited. Hours passed without a complaint. Other seasonal employees might have grown bored, but Roy already had years of experience staring into the distance.
Management admired his commitment. He arrived ready to work, stayed at his station, and never asked for a raise. For a while, it looked like the post office had finally hired the ideal employee.
Trouble Behind the Counter
The first problem involved the mail. Roy began marking packages “return to sender” because nobody had lived at the listed addresses for the last 80 years. Management tried to explain that the current residents were alive and merely away from home, but Roy remained suspicious.
He had been standing in town longer than some of the buildings, so he considered himself the most reliable source.
His lunch breaks also caused confusion. Every day, Roy took his break in the same position he used while working. He did not eat, move, or speak to anyone. Customers could not tell whether the counter was open, closed, or temporarily abandoned.
No one wanted to get close enough to ask.
Customer Service Became a Concern
Roy greeted each visitor with the same permanent smile. At first, customers considered him cheerful. After several minutes at the counter, that smile started to feel less friendly and more like a warning.
A few customers hurried through their transactions. Others left their packages near the door and backed away slowly.
Roy did not understand the complaints. His expression had remained consistent throughout his entire employment. Management agreed that he was dependable, but they could no longer ignore the growing stack of returned packages and nervous customers.
Still Reporting for Work
For now, Roy remains behind the counter. The post office needs someone to stay until cooler weather arrives, and Roy has shown no interest in abandoning his station. Whether management feels the same enthusiasm about extending his employment remains unclear.
Until then, he can add mail sorting, customer service, and frightening the general public to his growing list of qualifications.
The town has survived his employment so far.
Follow Roy’s Side Quests to see where this one-legged skeleton ends up next.
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